A 30-something reflection on the power of women supporting women
“So, how did the interview go?” My former colleague and friend asked over dinner and drinks.
I gently racked my brain. I couldn’t remember telling her I’d had an interview recently. It turns out the interviewer I’d met earlier that week for a social media role at a well-known cancer charity had worked with my friend a few years ago, and he’d contacted her asking if he should interview me. She told me she replied with a resounding “yes”, which I was humbled by. This gal — what a gem.
Perhaps it wasn’t a coincidence then, that we were meeting for a catch-up before heading to Melissa Hemsley’s The Sustainability Sessions — a weekly event running throughout the Autumn in London to bring more women together to give them tools for life, support one another, and ‘make Mondays more meaningful’ — this wasn’t networking. We were about to have conversations with purpose.
The session we were to attend with predominantly women (and the odd bloke) across a number of different sectors was called: Healthy, Happy Career Advice from Fearne Cotton, June Sarpong and Emma Gannon — and was in the spirit of women supporting women.
The event also raised funds for the aptly named Women Supporting Women, a group committed to changing the lives of young women at The Prince’s Trust, helping them gain the skills needed to live, learn and earn.
Having been on a short career break, I was keen to meet new people and have some honest conversations about the world of work and the premise and promise of having a healthy, happy career.
The event showed tremendous promise. And it didn’t disappoint.
The aforementioned women on the panel are all role models to me — and to many others I suspect. I used to study Fearne Cotton’s interview style when I did voluntary radio reports in the arts sector about 10 years ago. I’d resonated with The Multi-Hyphen Method by Emma Gannon like nothing I’d read in a long time.
“You’re not recording this, are you?” says Emma to Melissa before launching into her answer about how she’s doing today. Melissa, who hosted the event and effortlessly orchestrates the panel, confirmed that no, it wasn’t being recorded. The room collectively breathes a sigh of relief. We were in a safe zone. We could let our guards down.
The panel spoke about topics such as the importance of self-care and designing a career to suit your life. Fearne delighted that she was happy to be at the event and missing out on bath and bedtime. Emma offered that it was impossible to be worrying about accounts when looking out at the sea. Having lived near the Norfolk coast for the duration of my childhood, I concurred.
The panel recognised that careers in the media spotlight are fluid (and can be brutal) and yet careers as a whole are not linear — they need to adapt to changes in a woman’s life. Women are able to design their careers according to their changing circumstances and have multi-stranded CVs these days. What a relief. I was reminded of Rachel Syme’s tweet about ‘the swerve’ women face in their 30s — to try and ‘do it all’ in a compressed window.
“I feel like 33–38 is a really tough age for a lot of women I know; feels like so many big decisions and future plans have to be squeezed into this lil window; just me?”
Definitely not just you, Rach.
A woman in the audience tells a story of how she went against the grain expected of her by Indian upbringing, turning away from the family business and embarking on her own business venture, and mentoring other women in her community while she did it.
Another woman in the front row moved the audience, speaking out about her new career in television, and how the brusque behaviour of her (female) boss had brought her to tears most days. She told her story to the panel whilst her voice cracked with emotion and my friend and I nodded furiously with empathy, cheer-leading this young woman who had the courage to share her dilemma with the panel and the audience.
June Sarpong, now Head of Creative Diversity at the BBC (which deserved the huge round of applause she received — what a gal), took a trouble shooting approach to the issue.
“If leaving isn’t an option, have you thought about sitting your boss down, and asking her ‘How can I make your work-life easier?’ instead?”
The young woman felt heard. And so did the woman who piped up before her. Sometimes we just need to feel heard. That our experience is unique and our viewpoints are valid. Solutions and perspectives from mentors are brilliant too — and greatly appreciated.
I plan on attending more events like The Sustainability Sessions across London. Having worked on gender issues for most of my career, it ignited a little long-forgotten spark in me. And had led to this blog and rediscovering my love of writing for others again.
Instagram shows a plethora of hashtags in support of #womensupportingwomen. So do it. Support your fellow women:
- Say nice things about them to anyone who’ll listen.
- Share your contacts with them.
- Congratulate them when they do well.
- Give advice — if they ask you for it.
- Be there when they need to vent, laugh, or cry.
- Listen.
- And pay it forward.
Learn more about The Sustainability Sessions.
You can follow Melissa Hemsley, Emma Gannon, June Sarpong and Fearne Cotton on Instagram.
